Tips for Holiday and School Break Visitation

Holidays and school breaks are often exciting, meaningful times for families, offering opportunities for connection, rest, and tradition. However, for parents navigating child visitation schedules, these breaks can bring added stress with logistical and emotional challenges. Effective communication, advance planning, and a clear understanding of your custody and visitation schedules can help reduce conflict and ensure that you and your children can enjoy these special moments together.

Below are practical considerations and best practices for managing visitation during holidays and school breaks in California.

1. Review Your Custody and Visitation Order in Advance

Custody orders in California often include specific provisions addressing holidays, school breaks, and vacation periods. These may include alternating holidays, fixed holiday schedules, or extended parenting time during school recesses.

It is advisable to review your order well in advance of any holiday or break to confirm:

• Which parent has parenting time during specific holidays
• Whether holidays override the regular weekly schedule
• The designated start and end times for exchanges

Reviewing these details early helps avoid misunderstandings and allows time to address any uncertainties. It can also prevent disagreements during already busy periods.

2. Communicate Clearly and Respectfully

Effective communication between co-parents is essential, particularly during busy times such as holidays. When discussing schedules, travel, or exchanges during holidays and school breaks, communication between you and your co-parent should remain respectful, clear, and child-focused.

Best practices include:

• Proactive communication regarding the holiday and school break schedule
• Keep messages cordial and child-focused
• Use written communication (email or a co-parenting app, such as Our Family Wizard) to reduce confusion or miscommunication

Effective co-parenting communication can help prevent unnecessary disputes over the holidays and school breaks.

3. Be Flexible and Willing to Compromise

While custody and visitation orders should be followed, reasonable flexibility can benefit everyone involved, especially the children. Adjustments may be appropriate for family gatherings, travel opportunities, or unique circumstances, such as extended family visits that arise during school breaks and holidays.

Any agreed-upon changes should be documented in writing to avoid any misunderstandings. Flexibility should never come at the expense of consistency or a child’s sense of stability.

4. Plan Carefully for Travel and Provide Advance Notice

If travel is planned during a holiday or school break, review your custody and visitation order to ensure compliance with any travel-related requirements. These may include:

• Provide advance notice to the other parent
• Obtain written consent for out-of-state or international travel
• Share itineraries and contact information
• Create plans for the child to stay connected with their other parent

Planning ahead helps ensure compliance with court orders and avoids unnecessary conflicts.

5. Keep the Child’s Best Interests at the Center

Most importantly, holiday and school break schedules should center around the child’s best interest. Children benefit most when parents prioritize the children’s emotional needs and happiness. During holidays and school breaks, it is especially important to:

• Encourage positive relationships with both parents
• Do not discuss conflict or legal issues with your co-parent in front of or around your child
• Maintain consistent routines when possible
• Allow adjustments to the schedule if it benefits your child (e.g., travel opportunities or visits with extended family)

A cooperative, child-centered approach helps children feel secure and supported, even when schedules and routines change.

6. When to Consult a Family Law Attorney

If disputes arise, communication has broken down, or one parent will not comply with the orders, consulting with a family law attorney may be beneficial to your case. An attorney can assist with:

• Answering questions regarding your holiday and school break visitation orders
• Enforcing existing orders
• Modifying existing orders or responding to modification

If you have questions regarding holiday and school break visitation and custody orders, or potential modifications to the same, consulting with a knowledgeable California family law attorney can provide clarity and peace of mind.

Mello & Pickering, LLP has helped parents and their children work out their holiday and school break visitation issues in Palo Alto, Gilroy, Saratoga, Morgan Hill, Campbell, Los Altos, San Jose, Mountain View, Milpitas, Santa Clara, and Menlo Park, as well as in other cities in Santa Clara County. Mello & Pickering, LLP is conveniently located in San Jose, California. Please call us at (408) 288-7800 to schedule an initial consultation.